Saturday, January 10, 2015

Forelorn Hope



Your eyes spelled out that ennui
Gone that special touch for me
Where are those notes you used to send
I can sense this is the end

Your rosy scent I can breathe
No news for so long, so I seethe
Once you channeled all your life
Now you choose not to be my wife

Must I now capitulate? 
Drifting in an inky state 
Drenched with tears cold to the bone 
Now condemned to walk alone 

Please generate some hope for me 
List all I could do, you'll see 
A single smile, one warm glance 
To show I still have a chance 

Just what can I say to you? 
To show I'll be ever true 
And what gift can I render?
Proving my love is truly tender

Image found at www.cinema52.com

14 comments:

  1. I'm afraid once it's reached that state, all one can do is wrap oneself up in what's left of dignity and show by one's graciousness just how mistaken one's the departing partner really is.

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  2. Two words of advice
    fish and sea! :)

    Seamless use of the given words and clever rhyming couplets as well . Good one !

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  3. Oh dear, sounds like the end and I doubt you will manage to buy back her affection with a gift. Time to move on methinks.

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  4. That third verse is brilliant...captured every sense - the cold...the emptiness..and the inky state - what a wonderful but also lost place to be in (at times)...maybe the smell of that place is unique and indescribable but it's still there

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  5. It seems like begging and that isn't a very good place to be...you tell it well.

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  6. How very sad. This impassioned plea must surely win her over.

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  7. Having been in this situation, the only possible answer I can give to the last stanza is: Nothing.

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  8. I've lost a loved one once before and it is hard to cope with. Eventually I figured out a way to move forward, and that was the motivation that I didn't want to feel miserable anymore. I wasn't myself in those darkest of times. So it was an adventure on its own.

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  9. Now she can gets closer to business, farther from heart...with the offer from 4th stanza. The question: would he likes this side of the relationships?

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  10. Heart-wrenching...but beautifully written. The fourth verse is my favorite. I love the way you used the words so effortlessly!

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  11. A truly sad romantic poem .. and hope it's nothing more than the muse musing ... very well written it simply glides!

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  12. Sad poem because you could read as that he losing his wife to Mr Death. And he not ready to deal with that reality.

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  13. I can't imagine what this would be like, but you've written it very well so that I sympathize.

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