I find it hard to start over
Now that my wife has passed away
So all I can do is visit
Some of her favourite places
To see if I could find her one day
I walk on her favourite beach
To splash in the surf that she loved
Listen to the gulls squawk overhead
Crabs sidling on the sandy shore
Perhaps she watches me each day?
Just how can I begin again?
She is with me in everyway
The books she read, the pots and pans
Daffodils in Spring, everything
Then if I did, what would she say?
I think it best I stay as I am
With whom else would I chat and laugh
As I read the books that she loved
Shakes her head as I clean and dust
Even drink my coffee black each day
I find it hard to start over
I reach out each night to touch her
Lying there next to me in bed
There's still a pillow on her side
She's with me each and every day
Image found at https://pixabay.com/en/pair-couple-coast-sea-human-mood-843320/
I can feel the loneliness, my friend. I do believe her spirit is near. I had to smile at her shaking her head over your dusting attempts.
ReplyDeleteI hear the loneliness, too, and am therefore grateful for the gift of this poem, many will identify. After 21 years absence, though, I am beginning to find the days I spend that way with my lost one as Gifts!
ReplyDeleteSome things in life, some people, the memory of them... we should never let go. No starting over, when it comes to love no longer living. I've been know, for instance, to be very creative with holiday traditions. But I never change the ones I shared with my grandma or my little brother. NO starting over there. What we shared is what I have... even if the remembrance is bittersweet.
ReplyDeleteIt's wonderful reliving moments so close to heart. No new beginning from there, ever. Beautiful, Robin.
ReplyDeleteThis is deeply poignant, Robin. I can feel the ache, the pain and longing in your words.
ReplyDeleteLovely poem, I believe the spirits of our loved ones are with us.
ReplyDeleteSometimes in this life two people become soul mates. This is easy for me to understand as I feel that way about my husband. He is old and frail now. We do not now live under the same roof. But I telephone him sometimes and then I feel that a part of me is made whole again
ReplyDeleteHappy New Year Robin
much love...
I believed our departed loved ones are never faraway. Never let go of those memories.
ReplyDeleteAll the best for the year ahead!
Beautiful and sad... may the memories keep you going strong, my friend.
ReplyDeleteit happens in life as separation and misunderstandings intrude-it is not easy to start over again..maybe only in secret inside the heart, if it agrees
ReplyDeleteYes, starting over is a hard task. But staying stuck may be the harder choice. I think of the jilted Miss Havisham in Dickens's "Great Expectations." She stared at her moldy wedding cake for years and years and years. Is that any way to live?
ReplyDeleteWow. Just wow. You evoked my father in these years after my mother's passing. Thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeleteWow. My friend lost his wife in March, and put up all the Christmas decorations exactly as the did together. She took care of the planting on the block, and he had a plaque put on her favorite tree that says, Rosemary’s Garden. Thank you for sharing this in its love and honesty.
ReplyDelete